What Impression Am I Leaving on My Children?

Out of the Mouth of Babes

A friend recently shared on social media an “interview” she did with one of her children.  There were questions she asked, and wrote down the answers exactly as they were given.  Of course, it was one of those share posts, so I took the questions so that I could interview my children.  Here are what PJ and AJ think about their mom:

PJ

1. What is something mom always says to you?

Giving me a hugs

2. What makes mom happy?

Giving me hugs

3. What makes mom sad?

Not giving you hugs

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

With the jokes

5. What was your mom like as a child?

Play with baby toys

6. How old is your mom? 

3

7. How tall is your mom?

This tall (pulling out a measuring tape)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

Do dishes

9. What does your mom do when you’re not around?

Do dishes

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

Somebody won’t be around

11. What is your mom really good at?

At home

12. What is your mom not very good at? 

At not home

13. What does your mom do for a job?

Do dishes

14.What is your mom’s favorite food?

Salad

15.What makes you proud of your mom?

Help us

16. If your mom were a character, who would she be?

Our mommy

17. What do you and your mom do together?

Play with toys

18. How are you and your mom the same?

We have shirts

19. How are you and your mom different?

We have different shirts and shorts

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

With a hug

21. What does your mom like most about your dad?

I don’t know

22. Where is your mom’s favorite place to go?

To the north pole at the train

23. How old was your Mom when you were born?

3

AJ

1. What is something mom always says to you?

Go potty

2. What makes mom happy?

Peeing

3. What makes mom sad?

Lying to you

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

Giving hugs

5. What was your mom like as a child?

Play

6. How old is your mom?

3

7. How tall is your mom?

Bigger

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

Play

9. What does your mom do when you’re not around?

Sit down

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

Coloring

11. What is your mom really good at?

At home

12. What is your mom not very good at?

You’re not at the temple

13. What does your mom do for a job?

Give my daddy a hug

14.What is your mom’s favorite food?

Honey Bunches of Oats

15.What makes you proud of your mom?

Play

16. If your mom were a character, who would she be?

My brother

17. What do you and your mom do together?

Color

18. How are you and your mom the same?

Girls

19. How are you and your mom different?

The same

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

Very much

21. What does your mom like most about your dad?

Giving my daddy a hug

22. Where is your mom’s favorite place to go?

To the temple

23. How old was your Mom when you were born?

I don’t know.

The Take Away

What did I take away from these “interviews”?  First of all, my kids are watching what I do.  PJ sees me eating a salad almost every day for lunch.  AJ has obviously caught me sneaking some of the Honey Bunches of Oats cereal on occasion.  And apparently PJ sees me spending a lot of time at the kitchen sink!

My kids are listening to what I say.  AJ’s first answers are a result of some potty accidents in the past few days.  PJ remembers that I am always asking for hugs.  So, they are remembering some of the things I tell them.

It is the little things that are making an impact on my kids.  Those hugs I give them let them know I love them.  Neither of them said their favorite thing about going places or making things.  Their favorite things to do with me were simply playing with toys and coloring.

Questions For Me

After I asked my kids these questions, I had some questions for myself: What kind of impression am I leaving on my children?  My children watch everything I do and say.  If I could record myself being a mom, would I be happy with what they are seeing and hearing?  Would I be ashamed of what I see?

I am struck by Stephen Sondheim’s song “Children Will Listen” from Into the Woods.

Careful the things you say, children will listen.
Careful the things you do, children will see and learn.
Children may not obey but children will listen.
Children will look to you for which way to turn to learn what to be.
Careful before you say,”Listen to me.”
Children will listen.

I Can Be Better

I am leaving these “interviews” with a resolve to do and be better.  I know there are many areas where I can improve.  I want my children to listen to me, but I also want them to know I will listen to them.  I want my children to know I love them by the things I say and do.  A line from my favorite hymn says

I shall give love to those in need.  
I’ll show that love by word and deed.
(Because I Have Been Given Much, LDS Hymnbook #219)

No one needs my love more than my kids.  It shouldn’t matter the impression I leave on the world.  What should matter the most is the impression I leave on my children.